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Term Papers and Thanksgiving

Term papers… I don’t think there is ever a convenient time for them to be due. There are at least two camps of philosophy for assigning term papers around Thanksgiving.

The first is the professor who wants to give you something to be thankful about by assigning the paper to be due before you leave. The problem is that you stay up all night for several days writing papers and then drive home sleep-deprived. This makes the rest of the family speculate about the dark circles under your eyes, because you (obviously!) can’t be studying that hard. They figure you either must be on drugs or an alcoholic. So be thankful you got it done and that you are at least gorging on turkey, because it could be worse.

The second are the professors who don’t want to grade papers while they are spending time with their families, so they assign the paper to be due the first day after returning from Thanksgiving. What pure joy! Now you get to work during Thanksgiving itself. Still the family speculates about your well being because you’re overeating, grumpy, and not sleeping. Again the conclusions are the same — you are either on drugs or an alcoholic.

The solution? Sorry, don’t have one. Either way, you’re going to be spending too much time writing papers around the holiday. The trick, though, is to have books with you anytime you’re home — at least that way your family might possibly consider that you are in fact studying and maybe aren’t on drugs…

Pass the Turkey!
Professor Cram